Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Lucky? I say Loved!



When a person buys a house, they often take out a mortgage. What that means, is that although they think they own their house, the bank owns it. You make monthly payments to the bank, and they let you continue pretending that you own the house. It is all a game.
The trouble begins when the person can't meet their mortgage payments. After a while, the banks decide that they had enough, and they aren't going to play the game anymore. They are reclaiming the house that was really theirs all along. And so they file a lawsuit, saying they want to kick you out of your house for failure to make your mortgage payments.
It isn't pleasant to read about it in the newspapers, you don't think of it on a personal level. Imagine waking up one morning and seeing a sign on your neighbor's lawn that says "FORECLOSURE".
What?! You say. My neighbor's house was foreclosed? I never even knew they were having financial troubles!
You never knew? Shame it's too late, huh?

In my family, we understand the personal aspect of foreclosures. The original action was filed a couple of months ago, but they made a huge mistake in the filing. They filed two actions and each one had a signed statement saying that this was the only pending action on this particular property. So my father's lawyer (no, we don't have money for legal bills) got to work on this. And now it is a matter of stalling them.
They withdrew the action, and refiled it, with another, different mistake. Then, after a while, they sorted that mistake out, and made another.
Yesterday, my father's lawyer called him to say that they made another mistake. And then he said: "It's the fourth big mistake they made. It's hard to believe you can get so lucky."
Lucky? Hah! The lawyer is a yid, but obviously not a frum one, and doesn't understand. Even when Hashem is testing someone with a really tough nisayon, He helps them, protects them, gives them what they need. I don't know what the benefit of stalling it is, as I see foreclosure as inevitable. But obviously, there is a plan, a reason. Maybe indeed my father's business is destined to make a comeback, and we will have lots of money and be able to save the house. Who knows? After all, we all know: Yeshuas Hashem Keheref Ayin.
What I know is that we weren't lucky. Hashem is showing us that in the darkest of times, at the darkest of hours, in the hardest of situations, He is there, guiding us, holding our hand, and taking care of us. We are not lucky. We are in the loving embrace of Hashem.
And for now we are in our house, leaky roof, broken doors, mold, and all the rest. Because Hashem loves us, and this is where He wants us for now.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

"And for now we are in our house..."

This is the problem, that we think we our in our house. We are in Golus and Hashem is showing us that nothing in this world belongs to us. Iy"h we shoud see the geulah Bekarov and Hashem will bring us home. To His home- the one we want to be in.

By the way, how do you italicize?

Desperate Faith said...

Anon, you are so right. It is easy to get blinded by the illusions that make up olam hazeh.

Amein.

halfshared said...

Beautiful, beautiful message! You are truly blessed that despite (or in spite) of everything, you can still feel Hashem's love for you.

Desperate Faith said...

Halfshared, thanks, but I don't think you have the right idea. This business freaks me out, and I might need to take that picture down from my post cuz I get the shivers when I look at it.
It just struck me how ironic it sounds to use the word LUCKY in context of foreclosure proceedings!

me too said...

you are loved...very loved. don't ever forget that! (i know that's not what you wanna hear in response to this. but that's all i can say right now. you know how i am...)

Desperate Faith said...

Me too- no, it is ok...that is all I have for now....not love. HIS love. I'll take it.